Birthday

I was really able to think about my life and getting older after my birthday party this year. I have the best Best Friend ever (I'll have to write more on her later), but Tawni has a wonderful husband and a good friend to me. When Rob found out that Scott was going to be away on my birthday, he felt terrible. So he decided to throw me a birthday party. Through no fault of his own...no one came.

However, it will be a birthday I wont soon forget because I felt truly loved and appreciated. No politics, no acting put together, or worrying about my children being disruptive, no games-we-all-play-at-parties, no stress.

It was just me, my children, my two friends and their children.

Rob made dinner; just for me. We had steak with a homemade steak sauce, twice baked potatoes, and asparagus with a Benedict sauce. I got to spend time with my best friend, have great conversation, and just enjoy being me.

Our boys played (and fought) with their toys. We had Cookies and Creme Ice Cream Cake. And I was presented with a small packet of letters from friends. I loved them all...especially Shanda's (who lives on the other-side-of-the-world). It made me cry at the memories (I might retype it so you call can see how much we have been though together) and remember that this is what has made my life what it is. Building friendships and memories with friends that are like-minded, supportive and share a common faith with me.

I put the boys to bed and spent time with adults (something that can only really happen after 8:00 at night). As I was driving home that night at midnight with my two sleeping kids in the back seat, praying for the safety of my husband in another country, I had to stop and really thank God for how blessed I am with my friends and my family. Who cares that I am now 28? So what if I "feel" old.

This is my life, and the older I get, the more I learn about myself. I don't want to go back to the days of staying up until 4:00 am every night, or wondering if Mr. Cool is into me or not, or studying all night for the final just to sleep through my alarm the next morning. I am happy being in my late twenties, happy knowing that my husband loves me, happy that I have found a job that I love and am good at, happy with my children, and happy with the best friend (and her husband) anyone can find.

Happy 28th Birthday to me!

(still dreading 30, but I still have a couple years...)

28

This year I turned 28. I'm not really one to focus on age, especially not myself. It seemed silly that I always forgot how old I was when I was only 22, but somehow 6 years later, it is much more convenient. I love celebrating birthdays, just not ages. So when my birthday grew near I was thinking about how old I was, thinking I was turning 27. Except I know my lovely sister is having her 30th this year, which would make me 2 years younger. Dang, how can I be that old already?

I feel old.

Sometimes I still feel like I am fresh out of college, still a newlywed, starting out on this journey. But in reality, I have been married for almost 6 years now, at the same job for just as long and on my second promotion. We are happy with our little family and out two beautiful children. This is where we are, this is life, I am no longer "Just Starting Out"...maybe I need to change my blog?

I watch my student workers, still in college, being trained for a full time job after graduation. With late nights, Denny's study breaks, first dates, final exams...I know that! I was there! Not long ago. And yet, I feel so removed, I'm not one of them. We go to bed at 9:30, Denny's is for breakfast now, and we are lucky if we get one date night a month. I'm their boss, married with two kids.

I feel so old.

Please don't get me wrong, I am happy with my life. I love my life. But 28 is hard. I'm now in my late 20's. We have traded in our life of late night movies, spontaneous weekends, cheap Hyundai's traveling all over southern California, parties & clubs, fake nails, and Saturdays at the mall for early morning feedings, a house with a mortgage, minivans, kid birthday parties, Costco memberships, playgrounds, and full-time jobs.

I am old.

And yet...I love my life.

Caleb Baby Dedication

Sunday, April 3rd our church had baby dedication. Although Scott was out of town during the actual dedication, we decided we were still going to participate. The way Sandals Church does baby dedication is actually pretty cool. In the weeks before the Sunday dedication, they gather the families together one by one and video the family and have a short clip of the parents sharing something about teaching their child about Christ and our belief. (I have a clip of the video that I don't feel comfortable posting here if you would like to see it let me know and I can e-mail it to you.)

Scott was able to share in the video what we are most excited to teach our child about Christ. We discussed it and decided that we want first for our child to understand Christ’s love. Once you understand how great his love is and are able to love others in a Christ-like way, everything will fall into place. His patience, forgiveness, grace, everything starts with love.

Sunday was a crazy morning, rushing to get both boys ready and out the door early for church, I knew I was pushing it but I was still going to make it. That is until I went to walk out the door and I couldn’t find my keys. No blaming the kiddos on this one, it was all me and my forgetful brain. As I am searching the house with Brendan following me around "Keys Mommy? You need keys?" and Caleb crying because I keep passing him without picking him up...I finally find them and we race out of the house to church. I quickly park the car, grab the kids and rush in the door barely making it to the front row just as the movie starts.

My original plan was not to have Brendan with me during service but to drop him off to his class. But with no time, he stayed with me during the beginning part of service. He was so excited to see himself and Caleb up on the big movie screen. Brendan stayed with me up front and was very well behaved, clapped and cheered when the audience did, folded his hands and prayed when the pastor prayed with a loud AMEN at the end. He did ask me a few times when he got to go to “church”. The church gave Caleb (and us as parents) a nice certificate as a reminder of our commitment to raise our child in Christ. He was also given a wonderful Baby’s first Bible with thick board pages easy on baby’s hands.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get any pictures of us up front at church. But both boys behaved nicely and looked adorable in their matching shirts. I got a few pictures after for you to see.

Sunny Days

I know I have been absent for a little bit. For those of you that didn’t know, Scott was gone for 11 days on a Mission Trip to Belize. My hands were a little full and blogging was not on my top list of priorities. So much was going on, I’m not sure where to even start!

Scott left for his trip late Thursday (March 31st) night, but we didn’t see him after he left for work at 6:30 in the morning. Shortly after Scott left for work, I got a call from Marion saying she was sick and couldn’t watch the boys. This was the first time in the 2 ½ years we have been with her that she called me unable to watch the boys. I called around for childcare and luckily my sister agreed to watch the boys for a few hours while I went into to work to wrap things up on my desk. I did what I could in the morning and went home early to relieve my sis. I visited with Bekah for a bit and then the boys and I spent the afternoon and evening with Tawni and her boys.

Marion called again Thursday night saying she was still sick, I took the day off to be at home with my boys. My sister ended up needing to go to work for the morning, so I got to watch my beautiful niece for half the day on Friday. After the morning nap, my mom called me asking how things were going. She mentioned that usually watching an extra kid for her was a reminder she didn’t want more kids, and asked me if I was ready for number 3? I told her that it was a piece of cake and that I was supermom! Three is no problem, not much different than two, not that I am planning number three… At one point I was able to get all three kids down for a nap and have time to take a nice shower and watch (most of) an episode of Biggest Loser! We spent a lot of time outdoors on Friday, and most of the weekend actually. We hit potty-training pretty hard since the weather was warm enough to not wear pants :-) Both Caleb and Lily enjoyed the sunshine on a blanket, and Brendan ran all over soaking up the sun. Later that afternoon Tawni and her boys came over and we let the big boys play in the water while the sun was out.

Saturday I drug the boys around on a few errands, on our way home I picked up McDonalds to bring home. I told Brendan we were going to eat lunch outside for a picnic. He thought this was the best idea ever and since then has asked several time for “lunch outside”.

I realized that I am not a good housewife.
I spent 3 ½ days home with my kids and didn’t clean at all.
We colored outside,
walked to the park,
had a picnic in our backyard,
built castles with blocks,
played on a slip-and-slide,
cuddled on the couch for the 257th viewing of Monsters Inc,
and just enjoyed each other.

It was on Sunday night I looked around at the
blocks on the floor,
crayons on the kitchen table
and dinner dishes still in the sink.
I decided right then that
I.didn’t.care.

I’m not a stay-at-home mom, and if at the end of the day (or week) this is how my house looks, I’m okay with that. Because at least I enjoyed the time I had with my boys.

(P.S. I’m sorry for the way some of the pictures turned out, my camera is dying and I’m not very happy with it. It is time for a new one. Psst, Scott, that was a hint! Luckily Tawni took a few good pictures for me to use)